November 26, 2018
So you did it, you found the woman of your dreams. You are totally and completely in love and you cannot wait to spend the rest of your life with this amazing woman… Now, all you have to do is ask her… but how?
Proposal season is upon us and the love of your life deserves nothing less than the best. For most of you, this will be the first and only time you pop the question and you might not even know where to begin! But don’t you worry, I am here to help! Follow these 10 easy steps and you will have the girl of your dreams wrapped around you crying tears of joy before you know it!
Now this first step is one of the most important steps, once you get the ring, the rest will fall into place. There are a few ways to go about to make sure you are getting the woman of your dreams the ring of her dreams…
(A) Go shopping together. Some people LOVE this option. I mean, one of the biggest parts about a successful marriage is being a team and working together, so why wouldn’t you want to share this experience with one another.
(B) Get the Hint…. if she is the kind of woman who does not beat around the bush and has been sending you links, photos and pinterest boards for the last 18 months, you are one lucky man, you already know exactly what she wants…
(C) Consult her bestie. Let’s face it, women talk, this isn’t news… and what do you think one of the things we talk about when we are in a serious relationship, the engagement ring. Meet the future-maid-of-honor for some coffee, ask her to share the ring intel and get as much detail as possible. Her best-friend will be ALMOST as excited as you are…almost.
I know what you are thinking, how old fashioned… But let me fill you in on a little secret, this small gesture will mean the world to them and to your future wife. It will make her parents feel like they are a part of the celebration and why not keep your mother-in-law and father-in-law happy from the beginning. This will set the stage of your relationship with your in-laws for years to come!
It can be as simple or as lavish as you want it to be. Just remember, you know your girl the best, you know what means the most to her and what would make her happy. It can be right in front of her favorite taco stand that she took you to on one of your first dates, or in the middle of the park that you guys walk your dog in every day or even on top of the ferris-wheel. It can be in your apartment or at a fancy restaurant. At a carnival or on vacation. Don’t over think it, wherever you ask her, she will love it because it is your love story and you are making her dreams come true.
Now that you have the location, it is time to figure out how, how are you going to make this moment special, how are you going to set it up and how are you going to ask her. Are you going to send her on a scavenger hunt? Surprise her from out of town? Whisk her off to a romantic city? Once you get her to the location, are you going to get down on one knee, have her nieces and nephews surround her, show her a montage of your relationship? Before you pick the gesture, you should know, that most proposals are done in private, contrary to what Hollywood portrays. Consider who she is when deciding how big or how small the gesture should be! Your proposal story will be told hundreds of times, it might even be your grandkids favorite bedtime story, so make sure that whatever gesture you choose, it is consistent with who you are a couple.
This is it, it is the moment you both have been waiting for. The moment that will change your life forever. You are asking your best friend to be with you from now until forever, how special would it be to have this moment captured? To have this memory frozen forever. To have photos that will keep this moment and these feelings alive!
Now that you have the ring, the location, the gesture and the photographer, it is time to put it all together and create a master plan. You have worked hard to prepare for your big moment, winging your wedding proposal is not an option. Talk to all the necessary people to ensure that this moment goes off as well as possible. Consult the photographer about lighting and timing, even do a walk through of the location to make sure you know exactly where you are going, where she will be standing and how you will be kneeling. Consider traffic, late reservations, delays, and anything else that might create any issues. This way, you will be prepared and as ready as possible.
It is never a bad idea to have a Plan B. You never know what is going to happen. You never know if it will start pouring 5 minutes before your candle lit balcony proposal or the restaurant sits you at the wrong table or even there is a pop up beer garden at your favorite park, therefore, come up with a simple Plan B that is easy to pivot too. This way, you won’t add too much stress if something goes wrong.
These words, this question, the look in her eyes as she listens to you, is going t be a moment that will be cherished forever (no pressure)! I don’t know about all of you, but when I get nervous, I start rambling on and on and
usually end up not making any sense… practice what you are going to say, rehearse taking the ring out of your jacket or pants pocket and getting down on one knee. It will make your proposal go that much smoother and make you feel like you are the most romantic man that has ever been.
Sometimes, getting her there can be tricky, so you have to get creative. Make sure you know exactly how you are going to convince her to get there and consult everyone who will help you get there. I know, you are never supposed to lie to the woman you are going to marry (or to anyone in general), but let’s be real, this might be the ONLY time it is ok to tell her a small fib… She will forgive you for lying about your reservation being 20 minutes earlier or that you have to stay late at the office for a work thing. She will forgive you for not being able to meet her and her sister for brunch if that is all part of the grand proposal plan.
And finally, the most important thing… ask her to marry you. It will be the happiest moment of her life thus far and you will be the luckiest man on earth. It is as simple as that.
Ok… so what are you waiting for! Go get that ring, talk to her parents and consult her best friends! Go tell her how much you love her, how much you cannot wait to grow old together and how you will never want to wake up without her by your side.
Yael Pachino Photography LLC Copyright 2023-2024
I'm Yael, an award winning Jewish wedding photographer based out of South Jersey serving fun loving, warm hearted, madly in love couples who want to be totally present, cherish every moment of their wedding day and walk away with photos that make them feel the magic each and every time they see their wedding photos.
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